THE MORE junk politics you consume, the less likely you are to consume the essential stimulation that your mind relies on and the more likely you are to become susceptible to morbid Nationalism. AhDinnaeKen looks at a new scam to promote healthy politics.
PLANS TO crack down on junk politics in a bid to cut Scotland’s Nationalism crisis have been put out to consultation.
The proposals could see restrictions placed on “supersized” assertions, free wheeling, multi-contradictions and junk politics displays on social media outlets.
The move would cover Craig Murray, Peter A Bell, Newsnet, Mike Small, James Kelly and the litigious angry babyman with the misogyny complex.
Views are being sought on whether to include Bella Caledonia and The National.
The proposals were first outlined by the Scottish government in July, with the public and the social media echo chamber now being invited to give their views in a consultation that will be completely ignored.
Forty five percent of adults in Scotland are full of shit and 29% are said to be grossly deluded – with the figures remaining stubbornly high over the past four years.
The government says it wants to cut excessive consumption of horse shit, bullshit, sugar coated assertions and social media delusions, which it says would reduce the risks of developing type 2 Indyrefitis, a condition which leads to infighting disease.
But the Clowns Over Scotland Federation, which represents angry babymen and oddball social media eunuchs, has previously warned that the proposals would hit sadsack loners hardest and that there is no evidence the proposals would make one iota of a difference to the country’s general population.
The proposed restrictions would include, among other things, junk politics conspiracy theories, Kremlin supporting stooges, hate preaching misogynists, fake reverends, monotonous monologues masquerading as journalism and increased virtue signalling and overbearing sanctimony.
The new rules would apply to wherever unhealthy politics are sold to the public, including Twitter, Facebook and WordPress websites. Possible restrictions to other online outlets will also be explored.
Political health minister, Affur Fuksake said urgent action on politics high in assertion, fallacy and lies was needed to tackle Scotland’s “damaging relation with junk politics.”
He added: “No country has yet introduced such measures, so we cannot use the experience of Russia Today to demonstrate likely success.”
But the Online Echo Chamber Consortium said there needed to be a “level playing field” across the hate preaching and blaming the Yoons industry.
Its head of pointless court cases, Reverend Angry Babyman, said: “For the government to decide which online rants can and cannot be placed in which part of the internet is an unprecedented measure and one which sounds like Yoon conspiracy.
“For this intervention to be reasonable and proportionate to us sadsack eunuchs, it’s vital the Scottish government are forensic in identifying and justifying the policies which they put into the scope of these Yoon like restrictions.
“Furthermore, significant thought will be required to ensure the measures are practical for different junk politics outlooks and crank conspiracy theorists without inadvertently distorting the overall junk politics market.”