Category Archives: Referendum

Winter deaths up thanks to us claim SNP

IT’S LONG been known that the largest single block of No voters in the 2014 independence referendum were old, decrepit, closed minded, worthless “Yoons”. The SNP’s plan to deal with the “problem” has been hailed as a huge success by the “Indy minded” throughout the Nation. AhDinnaeKen reports:

Jeanne Freeman

“There are worse things than death. Have you ever spent time at an SNP conference?” asked Jeanne Freeman yesterday.

By Furr Coughhealth, age and psephology correspondent

“WINTER” DEATHS in Scotland reached their highest levels since devolution began, it was confirmed by the SNP today.

More than 23,000 oldies died as a result of SNP policies, leaflets, conferences, party political broadcasts and incessantly dull rhetoric that “indy is the only salvation”, according to the Department for Nationalist Statistics.

Virulent strains of Nationalist pish have been directly attributed to the encouraging rise in the number of fatalities.

Last winter the number of Nationalist pish related deaths trebled to just under 21,000.

Ms Yoon Hater, Chief Executive of Victory Through Fatality, said the long term trend should result in fewer available oldies and therefore less No voters to thwart any future Independence referendum plans.

And she added: “The average winter death value for the last eighteen years has been rising but ramped up exponentially in the last four (2014) as we became fully aware of who the true enemies of Scotland really were and whom we should indiscriminately target.”

The underlying causes of most of the additional deaths include boredom, lethargy, tediousness and monotony, all symptoms directly attributable to the SNP’s indy message and strategy.

Jeanne Freeman, Queen Quangocrat and something to do with health (this week), said:

“There is no doubt that we more than doubled our efforts into boring the oldies to death.

“These fantastic figures prove, if nothing else, that we’re getting something right.”

Nicola Sturgeon added: “This increase in fatalities should be seen as a beacon of our ‘progressive’ values.”

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Filed under health, Referendum, SNP

Nicola’s supersized beacon sandwich

Nicola Conference Speech

“We have no hope of winning independence just now” said Nicola to conference, “so tell the zoomers to tone it down a bit eh!”

By Yewvbin Telt – First Minister speech analyst and biographer

NICOLA STURGEON has called for “beacons and belief” from fellow Nationalists in her SNP conference “speech devoid of hope”

The First Minister said she was “more confident than ever” that she wouldn’t be calling an independence referendum while she remained in power.

She added that members must “wait like kids wait for Santa” and work to win over the rest of the party into doing nothing, just like her.

Ms Sturgeon also announced new policies on evading the subject of independence, not listening to activists, and ignoring inconvenient democratic votes.

The first minister was in fast spin mode on the final day of the SNP’s three-day conference of #HopeNoIndyHappensHere2018.

She used her speech to hit out at “indy believers” and “AOUB” for reminding people that she was doing “hee haw bugger aw” for the “cause”.

The SNP leader kicked off the conference by announcing that there was no “hope” for an Independence referendum before 2021.

But she offered “hope” for those interested in “beacons” when she described Scotland as “a beacon of progressive values.

“We have lit so many “progressive” beacons for the world that we can afford to make beacon sandwiches for the planet.

“We will be a beacon for beacon sandwiches.”

She admitted that people demanding Independence were a “serious problem” for her party and she would do more to get rid of them.

“Ask Alex Salmond what happens.” she half joked.

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Filed under IndyRef 2, Referendum, SNP, Treachery

Mike Russell: Scotland must look at ways to be democratic without consulting the people

Mike Russell

By Otto Kratanti-democratic mandates correspondent

SCOTLAND MUST look at more imaginative ways of ignoring demcoratic mandates demanded Mike Russell yesterday.

The Scottish Government’s Grievance Secretary warned against “believing in the sovereign will of the people” because doing so would only return a repeat result of the referendums of 2014 and 2016.

Holyrood currently has no power to undermine democratic accountability but, that shouldn’t stop it trying to do so the Grievance Secretary explained.

The SNP leadership is currently facing a crisis of pointlessness despite facing the most pointless Wastemonster government since records began.

Mr Russell said an alternative route to giving Scots a say on independence without actually consulting the Scots must now be explored.

He said: “If democracy can’t deliver the results we Scots need then we must seek the approval of the highest authority in the land, All Under One Banner and Tasmina Ahmed Sheikh.”

He added: “There has to be a healthy discussion about the ways in which we can undermine and ignore those Scotch “Yoon” bastards who illegitimately don’t vote for us.”

Nicola Sturgeon today refused to rule out a Unilateral Declaration of Independence for all true SNP Scots.

She said: “As committed (European) Unionists and true Scots, we believe in the free movement of all non-independence supporting Scotch to England any time they’re ready.

“The sooner the better.” she added.

Mr Russell continued: “One of the big issues is the feeling of powerlessness that people have – especially me.

“We can’t have a second referendum in which we do not win that referendum.

“Therefore, logically, we’re not going to have one. We’re just going to declare independence anyway and keep our fingers crossed that no one notices.”

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Filed under Diplomacy, Newspeak, Referendum

Shoot to Kill: Hosie’s radical new SNP policy for traitorous Unionists

SNP SWEAR oath of commitment to the protection of their homeland and their citizens.

"Shoot all the Unionists you want, if you can hit 'em, but remember it's a sin to kill a SNP votingbird." - said Hosie, yesterday.

“Shoot all the Unionists you want, if you can hit ’em, but remember it’s a sin to kill a SNP votingbird.” – said Hosie to Police Scotland, yesterday.

THE DEPUTY leader of the SNP has backed the right of Police Scotland to “shoot-to-kill Unionists” in the event of a second referendum.

Stewart Hosie said he would trust police officers to take the “necessary action” to track down those people who “talk Scotland down”.

Nationalist leader Nicola Sturgeon said on Monday she was “ambivalent” over police operating a Unionist shoot-to-kill policy.

She later clarified that she supported “a strictly non-SNP voting shoot-to-kill Unionists policy” such as Tory or Labour or Lib-Dem voters who deserved everything they got, plus some. But she insisted SNP voting Unionists should be spared.

She said: “The world has to see that we can tolerate Unionists on our soil. SNP voting Unionists can be rehabilitated and de-radicalised. They may even be economically viable. That’s why I think we should demonstrate our humane tolerant caring side.”

Mr Hosie told the Good Morning Scotland programme: “If a Unionist runs down Sauchiehall Street, God forbid, or Holyrood with a Better Together poster and a police officer has a split second decision to make, then the choice in terms of public safety is very clear.

He added: “We have seen the news reports from Saint Andrew’s this morning. These people won’t be arrested. One of the people who was subject to police investigations this morning blew up apparently – claimed they had they right to question our education record, economic illiteracy and oil price projections.

“There is no negotiating with someone who has that kind of hatred toward Scotland. Some are even prepared to quote Alex Bell verbatim.

“Split decisions require to be made and we all hope they are the right ones but I certainly would trust Police Scotland in those circumstances.”

AhDinnaeKen attempted to find a Unionist to comment on the new SNP shoot-to-kill policy commitment but no one – from the whole of the country – was prepared to comment.



Filed under Environment, Referendum

Thicker for Scotland – New SNP battle cry

SCOTLAND’S OUT of depth educashun secretary accidentally reveals cunning new Nationalist Neverendum victory plan:

"The function of education is to teach one to think intensively and to think critically." - Martin Luther King, Jr. There'll be none of that pish in our new Thicker Scotland said Constance yesterday.

“The function of education is to teach one to think intensively and to think critically.” – Martin Luther King, Jr. There’ll be none of that pish in our new Thicker Scotland said Constance yesterday.

By Thikaz PhukkEducashun Corespondet

THE Nationalists were in meltdown last night as educashun secretary Angela Constance laid the blame for Scotland’s declining school litrasy and numrasy on the Nationalists.

“The equity gap is utterly unacceptable,” she said. “The difference between what we say we’ll do and what we actually do is nowhere near wide enough.

“Some children are not failed by our rhetoric on education and we want to make sure it is all children who are failed by it.

“We want to instil into the poor kids that it’s okay to own a X-Box 360 instead of a X-Box One and that the Galaxy S3 smartphone can be as good as the latest iphone – we’ll teach them patience and acceptance and, if they vote SNP, they can pick one up cheap from Cash Converters at a preferable rate.

“We believe in equity for Nationalist voters.”

But, the flailing secretary unwittingly let loose the real reason for the concerted lowering of litrasy and numrasy rates in Scotland when she told “astonished” journalists:

“We know from our polling data that the younger you are, the less well off you are and the thicker you are, the more likely you are to fall for and vote for Nationalist assertions.

“Critical faculties are suspended when you’re too dumb to think for yourself and poll after poll proves that the thicker you are the more likely you are to be taken in by our magic money tree economics.

“As the past eight years have shown, if you keep churning them out without the ability to analyse or formulate original thought, they’ll believe anything we tell them.

“Thicker for Scotland – that will win the next Neverendum.”



Filed under Education, Referendum

Crybaby Nationalist takes to the bottle

A REDTOP newspaper exposes a vile threat from loose cannon cybernat Nick Durie. He repeatedly uses a word which suggests the potential influence of Stuart “Blub-blub” Campbell’s extremist blog, Wings Over Scotland. And a nugget of pre-indyref information slips out. Consequently, Blub-blub Campbell takes to the bottle for solace. AhDinnaeKen, with obvious caveats, falls off its proverbial seat laughing. Here’s why:

Don't do it Wingman. The country is depending on you. :)

Don’t do it Wingman. The country is depending on you. 🙂

By Longshanker aka @ergasiophobe

THE DAILY Record yesterday reported a vilely worded threat against indyref supporter and activist, Aidan Kerr, now defined by cybernats as a “defector”.

“Defector” is used four times in a sanctimonious tirade by “dedicated dad” and threatening cybernat, Nick Durie, who chillingly said of Aidan that he should be “castigated, shut down and prevented from operating”. Scary stuff and not very funny at all.

All that's missing are words like "cleansing" and "quisling" and "traitor to his country",

All that’s missing are words like “cleansing” and “quisling” and “traitor to his country”,

Ross McCafferty, social media commentator and mostly amusing wag, highlighted that the use of the word “defector” was used by Stuart Campbell in his blog predating Durie’s attack. Considering that Durie types are attracted to Wings like flies to something decidedly unpleasant, the link is a logical but potentially fallacious one to make – post hoc proctor ergo hoc etc.

A quick investigation proved Ross’s observation to be correct. But, to be fair to Blub-blub Campbell, he had used the word in quotes, suggesting its original use may have originated elsewhere.

Published on the 16th Feb this year, it certainly predates Durie's vile attack.

Published in the Wings on the 16th Feb this year, the use of “defector”certainly predates Durie’s vile attack. Coincidence or magic that Durie referred to Aidan Kerr as a “defector”? You decide.

So, was Campbell partly to blame for Durie’s tirade? Who knows? The jury’s out and we* certainly couldn’t say he was. We* know how authoritarian and bullying Campbell is and how fond he is of threatening law suits or setting the authorities on people to shut opinion down. So we*’re saying nothing.

There are several threads attached to this story and readers can follow them as they will.

AhDinnaeKen is concerned with the bombshell dropped by Yes campaigner, organiser and activist Ross Greer – referred to by Campbell at the top of the page.

According to Greer, much of his time and fellow Yes campaign organiser Jonathan Mackie’s time, was spent keeping the likes of Nick Durie and Wings Over Scotland as far away from the official Yes campaign as possible.

Official Yes campaign organiser openly admits Wings caused the campaign problems - shock. Cognitive dissonance a go-go.

Official Yes campaign organiser openly admits Wings caused the campaign problems – shock. Cognitive dissonance a go-go.

They clearly recognised the real and potential danger of such toxic campaigners being directly linked to their movement.

Public perception is everything in such vital campaigns and it’s possible, given a bit of conjecture and whataboutery, that the Yes campaign could have achieved a better result had they not been impaired by and associated with the likes of Campbell and his “creepy as f**k” grassroot surveillance goons.

What we do know, is that the poor wee hate-preaching blubberer is blubbing away into his vodka bottle in the official knowledge that the Yes campaign considered him to be as toxic as Nick Durie.

Blub-blub indeed.

We*’re still laughing.


The bottom tweet precedes the one above - proving that cybernats and extremist hate preachers have no sense of irony or self awareness. Natch!

This is a screengrab of Campbell’s Twitter timeline last night. The bottom tweet precedes the one above – proving that cybernats and extremist hate preachers have no sense of irony or self awareness at all. Natch!


Filed under MobNats, Referendum, Wangs Watch

Junckers – laughing up his sleeve at the Nationalists

DESPITE THE seeming moral victory of the Yes camp over the Naws concerning the recent Juncker clarification, AhDinnaeKen asks, does the clarification really make a great deal of difference to what was said:

Juncker: Referring to actual candidate states, not regional wannabe's.

Juncker: Referring to actual candidate states, not regional wannabe’s.

By WhitEU Lukkinet

BIG EURO Quangocrat, Jean-Claude Juncker, was not referring to Scotland when he said the gates were closed to new applicants to the EU.

Before the clarification, the No camp jumped the gun and gloatingly castigated the Yessers for what they perceived was the killer blow to the SNP’s Euro entry plans.

Following the unseemly stooshie, a spokesperson for the Big Euro Quangocrat clarified that Juncker was not talking about Scotland.

Cue the counter attack from the Yessers and a similar type of gloating righteousness.

In terms of tone, both campaigns looked and sounded the same. So no change there then.

Pantsonfire fighter, Nicola Sturgeon, wagged the righteous Nationalist finger of sanctimony and claimed that the No camp had engaged in a “blatant act of dishonesty”.

She should know.

Due to all the froth and white noise from both camps, one key point has been forgotten.

Of course Juncker was not referring to Scotland.

He didn’t need to.

Scotland, in the eyes of the EU, is a region presently debating separation from its current nation state.

Juncker stated that no new states would be admitted to the EC.

Scotland is not a new state, or any kind of state, in the legal treaty bound eyes of Europe.

If it becomes a new state, the stated Juncker rule regarding “candidate states”, applies.

And then, no doubt, Juncker will refer to Scotland’s “candidate” status directly.

It’s still a major blow to the Nationalists’ post-Indy assertions. No matter how you dress it up.

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Filed under Diplomacy, Referendum

British Brainwashing Corporation to be ‘held to account’ after independence

FOLLOWING THE storming of the BBC building at Pacific Quay on Sunday by two hundred thousand Nationalist ffrreeddoomm™ fichters, it’s clear there will be serious repercussions for Auntie McBeeb should the Nationalists gain control of Salmondland post Sep 18. AhDinnaeKen investigates:

Better Scot than Not. A sneak preview of the posters to be distributed by the House of Anti-Scottish Activities post Yes.

Better Scot than Not. A sneak preview of the posters to be distributed by the House of Anti-Scottish Activities post Yes on September 19.

By Uncle Salm McCarthy

THE BBC will ‘rue the day’ they trashed a ‘leading’ academic’s anti-imperialist research highlighting the corporation’s “anti-democratic”, “anti-Scottish”, thoughtcrime and “brainwashing” activities, according to a latter day Joseph McCarthy.

Professor John-George Robertson of the List-D University of the East of Scotland (UES), claimed that, post-independence, “the BBC are gettin’ it.”

A House of Anti-Scottish Activities Committee is to be set up by the professor to hold all the traitors, collaborators, quislings, anti-Scots and Unionist propagandists from the Brainwashing Corporation, to account:

"First they will be investigated, arrested, publicly humiliated, tried and sentenced", said no one in particular yesterday.

“First they will be investigated, arrested, publicly humiliated, tried and sentenced”, said no one in particular yesterday.

“Ken McQuarrier, Jim Naughtieboy and Jackie Birdy will be the first against the wall,” claimed the Professor.

“The rest will undergo some rigorous and scrupulously fair show trials in order to demonstrate to the McVolk what happens to the anti-Scots in civic and progressive Salmondland.”

According to a Nationalist spokesperson, photography philanthropist, Joan McAlpine MSP, has already collated a list of ‘known’ enemies of the McState.

Support posters, banners, flags, television adverts, apps and miscellaneous material will remind the McVolk of the traits, symptoms and behaviours of anti-Scots types. The McVolk will be encouraged to report their suspicions to the relevant authorities.

Polls, parkas, non-gingers, English looking McVolk and any other suspcious types will be the responsibility of Nationalist Front Commissar of Cowardly Behaviours, Reverend Censor Campbell.

Campbell said: “Wings Over Scotland will have a new meaning in an independent Salmondland. Instead of soaring over Scottish politics we will be soaring over all of the snivelling spineless cowards who put their X in the wrong box.

“And we will know who they are. We have a ‘BIG’ file.”

A spokesperson for the imperialist BBC said: “Jesus. Who are these people? Where do they come from? And where are they going?”

The House of Anti-Scottish Activities will be chaired by Professor Robertson and policed by the Nationalist Front from Sep 19.

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Filed under Lies, Media, Referendum, Treachery

Wings Over Scotland: Does Stewart Hosie MP endorse coordinated surveillance of political opponents?

MOST PEOPLE appear to have missed Stewart Hosie MP’s effusive eulogy of Wings Over Scotland recently. AhDinnaeKen certainly did. Given the timing and the recent rumpus over Campbell Gunn and his laughably amateur reliance on information, probably, gleaned from the Wings Over Scotland blog, we* thought Hosie’s praise was well worth a re-visit. AhDinnaeKen explains:

The Courier has been holding some excellent debates throughout its circulation area. It's a pity this one wasn't better reported on.

The Courier has been holding some excellent debates throughout its circulation area. It’s a pity this one didn’t receive further publicity in the light of some recent smoking Gunn’s.

By Longshanker aka @ergasiophobe

STEWART HOSIE MP is a Nationalist who could easily be described as an asset to the independence cause.

Unlike some of his compatriots, he looks and acts the part of the competent, forthright, no nonsense politician – an unusual phenomenon amongst Nationalist politicians.

Throughout his political career he has steadily increased his authority and has moved up the ranks, achieving the position of SNP Deputy Leader (Westminster division). In contrast to some of his fellow MPs, it would be fair to describe him as ‘solid’ and a safe pair of hands.

His television appearances are always dealt with by him in a peremptory authoritative fashion which brooks no credible opposition to his forthright arguments.

And that’s what makes his praise of the “phenomenon that is Wings Over Scotland” so curious. For someone who gives such a measured impression, this unrestrained eulogising over such a toxic, intolerant and potentially dangerous blog site, is as breathtaking as it is misguided.

At a Courier newspaper sponsored indy debate, held earlier this month on June 5, Hosie effectively anointed Nationalist Front blog, Wings Over Scotland and, by proxy, its editor, Stuart Campbell.

Hosie said:  (check around 27m 2os on video)

“We’ve seen the Bella Caledonia website – wonderful! The stuff the National Collective people do in the creative arts – wonderful! Newsnet Scotland doing a mainstream kind of job (sic).

“The phenomenon that is Wings Over Scotland. Who I understand now, have a hundred thousand page views a day and almost a million readers a year.”

As AhDinnaeKen pointed out last week, such figures are based on Google Analytics reports. For those figures to be used in such a manner is a bona fide sham – a complete and utter misleading falsehood – deliberately peddled to give a false impression of the reach, readership and reputation of the blog.

So, just like Nationalist Spin Doctor, Campbell Gunn, Hosie has shown that he is also willing to be duped by Wings’ editor Stuart Campbell’s toxic brand of lies, inaccuracies, misinformation and propaganda.

Due to the sycophantically sympathetic and supine nature of the Wings blog regarding independence and its passively uncritical view of Nationalist actions at Holyrood,  it’s easy to see why a mostly competent Nationalist politician like Hosie would be so willingly seduced by such meaningless figures and why he would perceive those “readership” figures as potential votes for Yes.

To compound his delight at this alleged grassroots upsurge of Nationalistic populism, Hosie went further in his praise of Wings:

“Now, whether you agree with them or not, the fact that the referendum has created so much interest, that a website like that is getting that kind of readership, that is quite spectacular.”

It would be “spectacular” if it was indeed getting that kind of readership. There’s no way of knowing what the actual readership figure is. And that’s why asserting such unverifiably false figures as “readership” and as a “phenomenon” fits so well into the common Nationalist narrative which mostly consists of bluster, belief and blind leaps of faith.

Curiously, Hosie’s portfolio at Westminster includes the role of Treasury spokesperson – a role, which according to the Parliament.UK website, he’s held since 2005.

Another set of figures which Stewart Hosie may have forgotten to verify independently.

Another set of figures which Treasury spokesperson Stewart Hosie might have forgotten to verify independently. Funny that.

It’s fair to conclude from this position that Hosie knows a lot about figures and how to disseminate them in a positive manner to reinforce the righteousness of his cause. It also explains why Hosie’s peddling of the figures disseminated by Wings, highlights a real weakness in the Treasury spokesperson’s alleged competence.

If Hosie could get the figures so spectacularly wrong with Wings without checking first, what else is he getting spectacularly wrong in his role as Treasury spokesperson? Did he verify or clarify those alleged readership figures from an independent source? Did he do the necessary groundwork? Or did he, take the information from the Wings blog as a given, without checking?

We* think we* should be told.

The parallels with Campbell Gunn’s rank amateur faux pas over the Clare Lally affair are clear to see. Both professional, political men appear to have been seduced and consequently duped by Wings unprofessional disingenuous innuendo. Both men, colloquially speaking, have made a right public arse of themselves by doing so. Hosie might just get away with it. The jury’s still out on Gunn.

Finally, we had the following supposition from Hosie, still on the subject of Wings – and to a lesser degree the other sites mentioned – where he engaged in a flight of futuristic fancy.

He said: “It will be interesting to see what happens, with all of those organisations and websites and Twitter feeds post-referendum – one way or another – to see if the community engagement and the activist engagement and these communities they’ve built, stay together and continue to do things.”

AhDinnaeKen wonders just what Hosie means by “continue to do things”. Perhaps he means “things” like the “creepy as f**k” coordinated surveillance of political opponents by Campbell from his flat in far away ‘gentrified’ Bath.

Campbell recently whined that he had been misrepresented by the Scotsman newspaper which reported that he “used the site to call on nationalist campaigners to photograph their opponents so that they can be publicly identified.”

If Campbell wants to complain about this Tweet which is still on display in his Twitter timeline, he can ask us to politely remove it, seeing as its allegedly causing him so much pain.

If Campbell wants to complain about this Tweet, which is still on display in his Twitter timeline, he can ask us* politely to remove it, seeing as it’s allegedly causing him so much pain.

Campbell bleated he’d been defamed by the Scotsman for reporting such and has allegedly instructed his lawyers to take requisite action. He has also allegedly complained to the Press Complaints Commission (PCC). We*’re still laughing at the prospect.

His complaint hinges around the Scotsman claim that the purpose of his coordinated surveillance was to “publicly” identify individuals. Campbell claims that was never the purpose of his orchestrated surveillance “operation”. Though he did admit to the Stasi like collation of a “BIG file” on political opponents.

Technically, Campbell might force an apology from the newspaper, though we* remain highly sceptical. If he does win anything, it will be a pyrrhic victory, for he’ll have to admit to the PCC that he had indeed engaged in a coordinated mobilisation of his ‘alert readers’ to surveil members of the public going about their daily business. No matter how you look at those “kind of things”, the reaction of the average person in the street is almost always the same – they find such actions “creepy as f**k”.

Are these grassroot manoeuvres the kind of “things” Hosie envisions those “communities” will “continue to do”?

If it is, then it’s a potentially potent political disaster in the making. And it’s an eminently avoidable one. The Nationalist hierarchy should deal with it now before it gets out of hand which, as the Campbell Gunn saga has so readily demonstrated, it might.

The SNP/Yes campaign make great capital out of possessing the grassroot “foot soldiers” who are going to take the Yes message direct to the doors of the people of Scotland. Many of these “foot soldiers” are advocates of Wings Over Scotland’s brand of so called “truth”.

What reassurance can the likes of Stewart Hosie provide to the public at large that these “communities” of grassroots activists aren’t going to be taking pictures, or worse, of No voters or their houses and be reporting back to some distant location in Somerset?

It’s not outwith the realms of possibility that Yes ‘Mavens’ with their blue and white Yes vests will end up being seen as sinister. And that would be a shame.

In a recent FT profile on the Wings Over Scotland phenomenon, Campbell predicted the following reaction in the event of a No vote: “people will feel they haven’t so much been beaten so much as they’ve been cheated.”

It’s open to speculation the kind of action Campbell would take upon such a result. He’s already demonstrated that he can locate and place willing and active grassroot “goons” virtually anywhere on the ground in Scotland. So, technically, nobody’s outwith his reach, anywhere throughout the country.

And Campbell has previously demonstrated a level of petty vindictiveness which borders on the pathological: his wishing of “all” old soldiers dead, calling victims of the Hillsborough disaster “c**ts” to the sister of one of the 96 dead, falsely claiming that the editor of AhDinnaeKen had been arrested for some Walter Mitty like fantasy crime against him, and calling on the burning down of parliament if independence wasn’t achieved in September, are all directly attributable to his titanic temper tantrums.

Jim Sillars engaged in some 'direct action' with Pat Kane some years ago. A window got broken. Campbell's solution is  a bit more radical going by this tweet.

Jim Sillars engaged in some ‘direct action’ with Pat Kane some years ago. A window got broken. Campbell’s solution is a bit more radical judging by this tweet.

All of these spiteful reactions occurred when something angered him, resulting in him lashing out disproportionately and without restraint. Who knows what he’ll be capable of if the referendum vote is a No. With his “BIG file” and his demonstrably unrestrained vengeful vitriolic vindictiveness, there is a real and present danger that something deeply unpleasant might just happen. We* hope that Stewart Hosie MP, Deputy Leader and Treasury spokesperson will be big enough to take his share of the responsibility if, and when, it does.

Hosie’s unrestrained praise for Wings took place after the coordinated surveillance “operation” had already occurred. Whether by accident or design, that means he has endorsed those “kind of things” as legitimate actions to engage in.

One of the accusations, rightly or wrongly, aimed at First Minister Salmond is that, by not sacking Campbell Gunn over his attempted smear of Clare Lally, he has effectively signalled that it’s open season for non-Yessers to be attacked without restraint – from the upper echelons to the lower grassroots.

Unless some kind of official statement is announced by the SNP regarding their relationship to Wings, with the intention of detoxifying Hosie’s effusive praise, then the signal is loud and clear: the Nationalists have declared a war of toxic hectoring abuse on their opponents. And, it’s likely to be perceived that they’re more than willing, like Salmond clearly demonstrated at FMQs, to turn a blind eye and ear to it.

Such a potential phenomenon fits some of the more well known and unpleasant stereotypes associated with Nationalism.


We* suggest you should dry your eyes and grow up you blackshirted baby.

We* respectfully suggest you should dry your eyes and grow up.

* pluralis majestatis used throughout in the pretence that we* still have an ironic sense of humour left


Filed under Newspeak, Referendum, Wangs Watch

Wings Over Scotland: The facts behind the Financial Times profile

THE PRESTIGIOUS FT reported on the ‘phenomenon’ that is Wings Over Scotand today. According to the FT – and Google Analytics – the Wings Over Scotland blog reaches 1.7 million unique users. That’s more than half the Scottish electorate. Is Wings Over Scotland the unrecognised gamechanger which the Yes campaign so desperately needs? AhDinnaeKen soporificates:

"The internet media is the message and the message is ME!" said a Jedi Reverend recently.

“The internet media is the message and the message is ME!” said a Jedi Reverend recently.

By Longshanker aka @ergasiophobe

WHATEVER YOU think of pro-independence blog, Wings Over Scotland (WOS), it can’t be denied that it is a phenomenon – of sorts.

To a particular type on the Yes side of the independence campaign, it is a beacon of hope, a debunker of mainstream media bias, an oasis of refreshing truth in a desert of unquenchable lies. In effect, Stuart ‘Charlie’ Campbell is seen as a righteous herald in the vanguard of Nationalistic ‘Tribune journalism’.

To almost everyone else, who is aware of it at least, the blog is a relentlessly aggressive Nationalist Front diatribe of hate-preaching, false accusation, paranoia, evasiveness, polarising invective, risible inaccuracies, extreme intolerance and “creepy as f**k” coordinated surveillance.

But whether you’re for the blog’s hate preaching demagoguery or against it, it can’t be denied that the monomaniacal ego driven individual behind it has attracted a certain type of attention during the Scottish referendum debate.

A sketch based profile in today’s Financial Times is an accolade of sorts and one which might encourage the Nationalist hierarchy to officially embrace the blog and the blogger behind it.

For the Nationalists to do so would be a strategic mistake. Many of the reasons why are embedded in the FT profile itself. There are many others, but for the purpose of this piece we*’ll stick to the Financial Times sketch.

Consider this from the second paragraph in the FT piece:

“Stuart Campbell, a video game designer and writer, uses his website Wings Over Scotland to demand an end to the 307-year-old union with England, attacking what he sees as the “lies” and patronising tone of the anti-independence movement.”

He’s a writer alright and he definitely knows how to construct a sentence. We*’ll concede that one.

Video game designer is maybe taking things a bit too far though. According to a prominent games industry insider: He always takes lots of credit for Cannon Fodder 2. Jon Hare, his boss says he just did some level design. But most of those levels were submitted by entrants to a competition. So Stu did little but takes credit for a lot.”

The 24th mission of Cannon Fodder 2 is to find out how many of the previous 23 missions Mr Campbell actually designed himself.

The 25th mission of Cannon Fodder 2 is to find out how many of the previous 24 missions Mr Campbell actually designed himself. The toughest misson of the lot.

Further investigation revealed that Amiga Power magazine did indeed run a competition in August 1994 for its readers to design levels for Canon Fodder 2. Campbell allegedly took direct possession of those competition entries from the magazine and used them for the game whilst employed by Sensible Software. ‘Alert readers’ can come to their own conclusions.

As for the “lies” and patronising tone of the indy debate”, if only Campbell could see hissel as ithers see him.

It’s worth noting that Campbell is a frequent user of the Thatcherite sounding term ‘WetNat’ which he uses with impunity to attack pro-Yes independence activists who don’t happen to agree with his hate-preaching tone or manner. Presumably, they are also part of the “lies” and “patronising tone”

When it comes to assertion based puffery, Mr Campbell can match and exceed anyone in the campaign – and that includes half witted politicians such as Pete Wishart MP. The FT further reported:

“With just over 100 days to go, Mr Campbell believes the internet has been one of the reasons the Yes camp is still in contention.” – nothing to do with the fact that the Nationalists have the full resources, power and expense sheet of a devolved government behind them then.

The emphasis above, of course, should be on the word “believes”. Tangible evidence is notable by its absence.

Campbell further asserted: “I think we would be absolutely nowhere without the internet. If this referendum was taking place in 1979, when we had the first devolution referendum, we would have no chance. But now people have somewhere else they can go and check the facts.”

The implication is clear, due to his blog, the Yes campaign is still in the running. Phrases such as “ye couldnae make it up” might be more fitting for such a risible assertion, but it’s worth looking at the evidence provided and the wriggle room it gives for Campbell’s ‘ego out of control’ hyperbole.

The FT reported Wings Over Scotland as the “biggest” politically dedicated website in the Yes campaign and cites a figure of 1.7 million unique users.

Impressive sounding stats indeed and, as Mr Campbell is more than keen to point out, that figure is more than half of the Scottish electorate, “If we got 1.7m votes in the referendum we would win.” he said.

But just how much credibility does that 1.7 million figure actually have?

Not much is the simple answer.

Like Campbell’s admission that he does not know the ‘political leanings’ of his ‘alert readers’, the 1.7 million is also a ‘known unknown’ which is effectively a stab in the dark at the true number of actual readers.

According to Yehoshua Coren, a Google Analytics expert, unique visitors are not commensurate with unique people.

He said: “We use the term “visitor,” but technically this means “__utma Cookie.” Cookies are browser specific. So if I, Yehoshua Coren, visit in a 5 minute span from 3 different browsers, GA (Google Analytics) reports that 3 “unique visitors” came to the site. Similarly, if 3 different people in my household visit at different times throughout the day, this is 1 “unique visitor.” Lastly, if I visit a website repeatedly using Private Browsing (Firefox) or Incognito Mode (Chrome), etc, my cookies are cleared on browser close so I’ll be an additional “unique visitor” (with a ‘new visit’) on every subsequent visit.”

These impressive figures are 'unique device' figures. Almost three times the population of the whole of Britain views the Daily Mail online. Wow! But how many real people does that actually translate into?

These impressive figures are ‘unique device’ figures. Almost three times the population of the whole of Britain views the Daily Mail online per month. Wow! But how many real people does that actually translate into?

In effect, the 1.7m figure is mostly meaningless if you’re trying to base a unique number of actual people visiting the blog. And it’s clear from reading the FT piece that the 1.7m figure cited is a cumulative figure from Wings first foray in the indy blogosphere in 2011. In effect, the 1.7m figure is as big a sham as Campbell’s thinly veiled claim to have helped keep the Yes campaign in the running.

It’s uncommon now for AhDinnaeKen to visit the WOS blog, but over the past three years it’s fair to say that I’ve used three different browsers on my laptop, occasionally I’ve browsed a page from my smartphone or my tablet and I’ve also looked at it from my NetBook.

According to Google Analytics data collation, that counts as at least six unique visitors. And given that I also have Private browsing switched on in Firefox on both the netbook and the laptop, that figure is likely to be exponentially higher.

AhDinnaeKen can make the claim that we*’ve almost reached a quarter of a million unique visitors since Feb 2012 – but the majority of them appear to be spammers. And the rest are visits by people mistaking us* for the “Onion” and finding out we* were “unfunny”.

So, for someone who claims to attack the “lies” and patronising tone of the anti-independence movement”, Mr Campbell really needs to get a better grasp of reality and stop lying to and patronising his own ‘alert readers’ with such questionably meaningless figures.

The £50,000 or so that he raised from Indiegogo is laudable, but given that questions have been raised over whether the lottery winning Weirs had anything to do with it, it’s mostly moot – as well as somewhat diminished.

It was highly notable that Mr Campbell did not hold a press event with a big symbolic cheque proudly displaying the alleged figure of £150,000 raised emblazoned on its front – as suggested by political commentator Euan McColm.

This may or may not have happened. But given the general "evasiveness" and lack of tangible proof, 'alert readers' can make up their own minds.

This may or may not have happened. But given the general “evasiveness” and lack of tangible proof, ‘alert readers’ can make up their own minds.

Also worth remembering is the old proverb (in)actions speak louder than words. In this instance, for a struggling Yes campaign, such a press conference could have been a publicity coup and a clear demonstration of the alleged grassroots momentum and passion for the campaign.

As such, the money raised was more of a damp squib than a high flying firework.

Then we come to the real lacking in the whole outlook and persona of Mr Campbell’s Wings Over Scotland campaign: his undisguised anger toward and hatred of the ‘other’ side.

Campbell told the man from the FT, presumably with a straight face:

“I don’t want to find myself living in Scotland if it’s a No vote. I couldn’t bear it. I would feel I was living in the most cowardly nation on earth.”

AhDinnaeKen is incapable of seeing the logic, reason or sentiment behind such a fundamentally zealotous belief. Once you’ve stopped laughing, you realise that such a belief is the philosophy of the extremist. Condemning your nation’s people for taking a democratic decision with which you disagree is what is cowardly. It displays the monomania of the wee boy who takes his ball away because his team urnae winning. We* respectfully suggest that Mr Campbell should dry his eyes.

Such a person would also probably refer to allegedly fellow Scots as “cringing pitiful scum” for voting incorrectly. Er, haud on, Campbell already has.

Whether it’s a Yes or No vote, AhDinnaeKen disnae care. Just so long as it’s a convincing victory and we can all be protected from the raw and ugly forces which inevitably drive Nationalism – whether it’s disguised as ‘civic’ or ‘progressive’ or whatever snake skin oil it happens to be wearing that day.

Campbell and his labelling of non-Yes voters as “cowards” personifies that Nationalist ugliness. If the SNP or Yes campaign embrace Wings, or any of its proposed indyref events, then it will be a sure fire reinforcement of Professor Tomkins recent assertion that the Nationalists had stopped trying to win the referendum and were now merely trying to shore up their core vote. Tomkins

Wings Over Scotland is now officially recognised by the Electoral Commission as an official  Yes campaigner. It means that Wings should face some real and proper scrutiny rather than being mostly ignored by the media as an irritating irrelevance.

The FT alludes to what could come. When questioned on the “reverend” status the reaction of Mr Campbell was described as “sketchy“. Which it would be, of course. He claimed that he had trained for church orders – it’s worth mentioning that the Jedi religion refer to themselves as a church.

Most notably, the word “evasive” is also used by FT journo John Murray Brown in relation to Campbell’s alleged passion for independence and his irreconcilable adherence to living in England for almost half his adult life, referred to in the piece as “two decades”.

Derek Bateman said recently of James Naughtie and Andrew Marr: “The problem here is one of assimilation because after 25 or 30 years absorbing London culture and learning about it, embedding themselves there and bringing up families, they lose some aspect of what makes them Scots.”

Well said Derek. The same could just as easily be said of Wings Over Scotland's Stuart Campbell, could it not?

Well said Derek. The same could just as easily be said of Wings Over Scotland’s Stuart Campbell, could it not?

The same holds for Campbell. AhDinnaeKen doesn’t recognise Campbell’s aspect of Scottishness. It’s out of date, distant, nasty and not commensurate with anything remotely ‘civic’ or ‘progressive’. The vision of an independent Scotland put forward by Campbell conjures up an image of jackboots, state surveillance, authoritarianism and intolerance.

The SNP should bear this in mind. The unique reader figures cited for the WOS blog are a testable sham. The blog is undeniably popular, but do the figures stack up? The philosophy of Campbell is built on intolerance, ‘othering’ and hateful extremism. If the Nationalists embrace him in the lead up to Sep 18 then they will taint themselves with the same label.

And it will be an inescapably damaging label.

We* await with interest developments on the campaigning front.


* pluralis majestatis used throughout for illustrative unfunny comedy effect.


Filed under Newspeak, Referendum, Wangs Watch

Scottish Independence: Electorate ‘unfazed’ by Salmond dictator comparisons

WHILE the Nationalists whip up some faux outrage and indignation at warp factor ten, 88% of voters said “Ho hum. Beam up the next grievance please. This one’s as dull as a di-lithium crystal scabby knee.” AhDinnaeKen soporificates:

Kim Jong-il Salmond and Moan McVulpine at the Big Parish Cooncil, yesterday.

Kim Jong-il Salmond and ‘aide’, Moan McVulpine, at the Big Parish Cooncil, yesterday.

By Hook Airs

THE SCOTTISH electorate is unfazed by the prospect of Firstminster Salmond being compared to a fat dictator, authors of a report have suggested.

According to the Institute of Straw Polls, the average punter in the street thought the Firstminster was a fat dictator anyway, with 37 per cent affectionately referring to him as ‘Jabba the Gutt’.

But Nationalist drones dismissed the findings, insisting that no subject was too small or too trivial to deflect from the question on everyone’s lips, “Has the Firstminster shagged Moan McVulpine while discussing the fiscal considerations of the oil index on the inter-disciplinary repercussions of tax returns, currency union and iScotland start-up costs?”

Darling mumbled, "Have you ever tried lifting 75 litres of bloody soil at B&Q?"

Darling mumbled, “Have you ever tried lifting 75 litres of bloody soil at B&Q?”

In an exclusive cock-up from the not so New Statesman, ex-Chancellor of the Imperial British Reich, Moveover Darling, did not say. “I haff vays of not making me tock.”

Mike Smalldick of the increasingly hysterical Bella Caledonication website, referred to the jibe as “standard Salmond Dictator Bingo” aka ‘one rubber duck, nobody gives a f**k’.

Smalldick further bleated: “This is pathetic. No one is taking a blind bit of notice of our faux outrage because they’ve seen and heard it all before.

“But rest assured there will be plenty more faux outrage, screaming, wailing and gnashing of teeth as it becomes increasingly clear that the majority of Scots don’t give a Kim Jong-il about the rebirth of oor Salmondland.

“It makes my blood-soil boil, it really does. Kevin, where’s that Butcher’s Apron and the matches?”


Filed under Media, Newspeak, Referendum

Scottish independence: Tories outflank everyone – including the Tories

MORE POWERS for the Big Parish Cooncil at Whollyrude will ensure Scots will end up hating the SNP just as much as they hate the Tories. AhDinnaeKen investigates:

"What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin." - Mark Twain

“What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin.” – Mark Twain

By Tory Story

SCOTLAND’S GOVERNMENT should be given a taste of real responsibility before taking fantastical leaps of faith, the Scottish Conservatives said yesterday.

Roof Davidson, Scottish leader of the despicable, evil, baby impoverishing Tories, said it was time for Scotland to “stop living on pocket money and get a paper round instead”.

Speaking to a collection of elitist monsters including her mainstream media buddies at the British Brainwashing Corporation, Roof concluded that it was time for the SNP to “stop playing at politics” and “waken up in the real world”.

She said Whollyrude – currently funded by corrupt Westminster gold – must learn the tough lessons of growing up before leaving home and getting taken to the cleaners by speculative sharks.

Her speech was broadly welcomed as the first thing a Conservative politician has said in Scotland in, literally, decades which made the Labouring party take second place to a despicable Tory.

Referring to the findings of a commissioned report, Roof outlined the main thrust of the plans:

  • There was a solid case for the Scottish Government to navel gaze rather than continually blame Westminster.


  • The ability to tax the poorest workers was to remain in the hands of the big boys in London.


  • A new body should be created to report back on just how disastrous the extra responsibility will be to the Nationalists credibility and popularity.


  • There should be a public holiday declared so that everyone could scrutinise what the Nationalists had brought upon the country.

Roof insisted the proposals were a sure fire way of stymying the belief held in some quarters that the SNP did what was best for Scotland rather than what was best for the SNP.

Auld Nick Sturgeon, deputy pantsonfire leader of the Whollyrude Freedom Fighters Against Evil Westminster Oppression, said: “I hate that bastard Davidson. When we get gubbed in September we’re not even going to get the consolation prize of being able to blame it on everyone else.

“People are going to look at the SNP and say, ‘You’re responsible for this’.

“That thought is quite scary. I wish I’d stayed in the hoose.”

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Filed under Referendum