Serious questions raised in Scots Plasticine Parliament over type of medication to be dispensed to predicted traumatisation of voters.
By Farmah Sist
TOP SPINDCOCTORS will today urge the Scottish Plasticine Parliament to allow voters a morning after pill – in VOTING BOOTHS.
Ruth Wholeperson, chairperson of the Scottish Traumatised Voter Mentalists Group, will tell Whollyrude’s political mentalists that urgent action will need to be taken.
The Government had aimed to cut post-Neverendum trauma with a Yes vote, but that eventuality has had to be discounted.
Currently Voter nurses can’t dispense medication – but can advise voters to contact mental clinics.
Here, two experts JOCK MCAVERAGE and FROTHING PARTISAN tell their views on the controversial issue.
NO: JOCK MCAVERAGE of Pondlife charity
AS an individual with day to day priorities, I’d worry that these damn Nationalist types will be able to escape the consequence of what they’ve done.
By giving out the voter-after pill in booths, we teach voters they need not be responsible.
You’re sending out a message to voters that they can do what they like.
How is that going to help voters to respect themselves or their political opponents.
If you’re going to give voters methadone before the vote and then a morning-after pill, they’re less likely to use discretion.
One in three voters in Scotland currently believe in the SNP fantasy – we have reached epidemic proportions.
The other morning-after pill was designed to breed these people out of the system.
Voters don’t behave today the way they did a generation ago. Twitter and WordPress has made them think they have something important to say.
I send my children to voting booths to vote and I find it astonishing they could be handed the morning-after pill to repudiate their actions.
YES: FROTHING PARTISAN co-leader of the GREENGOES
THE VOTER nurse network is there to look after the health and wellbeing of voters and I see no reason to exclude those who may be making a catastrophic mistake.
Voters have a right to access the service and that’s only being challenged by mentalists who realise how tediously mental the whole Neverendum debate actually is.
If someone needs emergency voterception they need to access it early – they’ll have the rest of their lives to face the consequence of what they’ve done.
Some voters will want to access a service out of the voting booth and may have seen their overpriced MSP – which will ultimately be a useless and dispiriting experience for them.
It is a delicate balance between living up to your responsibilities or living in denial for the consequences of your actions.
Whatever the result of the Neverendum, at least one third of the country is going to need medicated for a very long time.