Tag Archives: faith

Moan McVulpine: There are risks that go along with treating voters as if they’re idiots

MOAN’S baser urges have got her and those surrounding her into a lot of trouble. Something which is always worth thinking about when reading her Daily Redcoat propaganda.
Moan McVulpine Banner

By Moan McVulpineputting the un into uncertainty

EVERY MAJOR life decision carries an element of uncertainty.

But not as much risk as taking the leap of faith required to believe a Nationalist on the make.

Having your kids read the newspapers is a risk. Especially when you’re the front page splash on the Daily Mail on a good few occasions.

Not just risky, embarrassing as hell – for everyone involved.

Fortunately, for the survival of the Yes campaign, most Yessers are just too focused on the nasty evil imperial tories and their rightwing media cohorts to see through the malignancy and falsehood lieing at the very heart of the Nationalist vanity project.

So, over-proscribed finger pointing proselytising aside, it’s on to normal domestic life risks and the equating of those risks to voting for ffrreeddoomm™ in September.

Normal ‘everyday’ life carries varying types of risk: growing up, accepting a job offer, getting married, having kids, getting divorced, jumping into the sack with other married people, making dodgy payments to those other married people and threatening the innocent injured party with financial ruin in order to cover it all up.

That’s risky behaviour for a ‘would be’ and ‘then became’ politician to indulge in.

And yet, this politician still has the vanity and vainglorious ego to believe that anyone with any decency would take anything they say with more than a pinch of distasteful salt.

But that’s Nationalist types for you – blind to their own shortcomings and hypersensitive to the failings of others.

One of the jibes currently gaining currency as a potential tactic into goading people into voting Yes vote is that of ‘feartie’ and its numerous tedious incarnations.

The Daily Redcoat today has a certain ginger whinger claiming that they think of “personal life choices when people talk about their fear of voting Yes to independence “because of the uncertainty”.”

Put simply, the ‘wee white whine’ thinks voting Yes would be like any domestic life decision which carries risk.

What the ‘whine’ fails to take into consideration is that every one of these personal life decisions referred to also leaves the decision maker with the ability to make realistic future projections for themselves.

A marketing type would call it a SWOT analysis.

In most cases the variables involved are limited and always potentially within the control of the decision maker, fingers crossed.

Whereas, voting Yes involves putting faith in others about whom you know next to nothing and what you do know isnae up to much – or very confidence inducing.

In this instance confidence is being confused with faith. It doesn’t take confidence to vote Yes, it takes faith.

And, the type of faith voters are being asked to be confident about is the faith of supposition, untested projection, delusion and assertion – and that’s just the good points.

When you look at some of the people making these ‘confident’ claims it takes the bravest of hearts not to wilt.

That’s not to say that there’s much to be pleased about with a No vote. Much of what the Nationalists say about the current UK government has a ring of truth in it. Competent propaganda usually does.

But, with the centralised Scottish police ‘tooling up’ in the Highlands, Nationalists like Vladimir Putin being praised for their ‘pride’ restoring abilities and Sun King Salmond working on the recruitment of right wing hawks like Rupert Murdoch to the cause, it doesn’t take too much artistic ‘imagining’ to see what’s coming in the advent of a triumphant vote for the Nationalist Front.

The alternative is to accept that our future is in someone else’s hands as opposed to the alternative alternative of putting our future in someone else’s hands.

Whatever way you vote and no matter how you look at it, you’re putting your future in someone else’s hands.

Of that you can be confident.

COMEDY RELIEF

Advertisements

1 Comment

Filed under Moan McVulpine, Opinion

Mary Queen of Salmond’s speech in Bruges: “Help! Help! We’re being oppressed!”

THEY SAY history repeats. And no one knows that better than Scotland’s very ain history graduate Firstminster, Mary Queen of Salmond. AhDinnaeKen poses the question, are we witnessing a post-modern Scottish reformation in reverse? Or is Salmond just a suck up tart, willing to go to bed with anyone with power who isn’t English?

"A man with Nationalism is always in the majority." - John Knox

“A man with Nationalism is always in the majority.” – John Knox.   Mary Queen of Salmond yesterday.

By Buchérs Appron-Burnérre

MARY QUEEN of Salmond issued his strongest appeal to the forces of European Union unity and reformation yesterday.

“Help us”, he cried. “The big bad English are oppressing us with their terrible parliament and archaic imperialism and we need your protection – they are too many for us.

“What’s more”, he wailed, “They’re calling you guys bad names and are kidding themselves on they don’t want to be part of your gang any more.

“We jist want sum o’ that sovereignty the basturt English ur denying us the noo, so that we can gie it to you, so that we don’t huv it in the future either.

“We want reassurance that we’ll still be able to blame ithers when things don’t go oor way. It’s the Nationalist culture y’ken – a tartan weave fabric of grievance, blame and chip on shooder.

“The case for independence rests on a simple but overwhelming truth – we hate the basturt English. And so should you guys.

“If you don’t hate them as much as we dae, then ye’ll no be gettin’ nae fish fae oor waters.

“Think aboot that. Nae mare smokies, fish and chips or cocktail de langoustines in white vino sauce.

“Ya bass!

“But above all things, we will be yer pal. We think youse ur great. We think yer the greatest thing since the Treaty of Edinburgh was signed by the European Union, Queen Elizabeth I and the Lords of the Congregation – or deep fried Mars bars. Whitever floats yer boat.

“We see a Yes vote as a chance to reverse that treacherous document and bring us back into the fold of European Unification.

“Let me assure you. We urnae Margaret Thatcher. She wis an awfy bad wummin. No that ah’ve got anything against women (wish I could say that wiz reciprocated).

“Thatcher didnae like youse. We dae.

“So gies oor ffrreeddoomm™! Go on. Gie’s it.

“Ye know ye want to. Jist think o’ the fish, the oil and the hot air energy.

“Ah’m yer pal. And if ye’ll no be oor pal, then there’s always Vladimir Putin.

“He wid soon sort ye’s oot if ah gave him the nod.

“So let us in – assuming we achieve oor ffrreeddoomm™ – or yer no gettin’ the fish.

“How civic’s that? Eh?”

6 Comments

Filed under Opinion, Referendum

Moan McVulpine: Sick of listening to empty assertions

MOAN says the only way marriages can guarantee fidelity is for wives to have eyes in the back of their heads when Moan’s around.
Moan McVulpine Banner
By Moan McVulpinetaking the fidelity out of infidelity

IF YOU leave out the “in” word, most people in Scotland back infidelity.

By that I mean a majority want the power of a faithful marriage, even if folk like me still find the concept meaningless.

I want power over faithful wives so that never again do I have to commission photos as a proxy payment for my erstwhile gigolos.

I want power over auld Granny Salmond so that “special time” becomes “all the time”.

I want everything these naively faithful wives have – security, a loving environment, someone to pay their speeding fines.

But no one wants to share that with me. Not even my own husband!

I want control of the Firstminster to protect me from myself.

I want control of all the MSPs around me at Whollyrude.

I want control of pensions so that if Granny Salmond gets out of hand I can threaten her where it hurts – her purse.

Virtually no one in Scotland or the Scottish parliament trusts me – I don’t know why.

I’m doing this for my country – for the greater love of my people.

To condemn me is to condemn Scotland. Don’t these anti-Scots get that?

Some whisper there is a need to protect wives from what is happening within a 100 metre radius of me.

In an independent Scotland no marriage will be safe. Why should it be?

Marriage has stuttered and stammered for the past 300 years. And it’s a Union, like a political Union I know, which has outlived its purpose.

Haven’t my past actions proved that?

You know how to vote come September.

Vote (in)fidelity.

COMEDY RELIEF

5 Comments

Filed under Moan McVulpine, Treachery