Moan McVulpine: Pretender to the Scots crown? Yes First Minister

AS Firstminster Salmond maintains the ruse of the North Sea’s potential, MOAN insists that’s the sole reason independence will have a chance in September – everyone in Scotland wants their X-Box:
Moan McVulpine Banner

By Moan McVulpineTaking the rational out of exaggerational

BARE FACED Liar One rose out of a Portlethen graveyard yesterday.

Out flounced Firstminster Salmond surrounded by the metaphorical graves of his long buried assertions.

“£1.5 trillion of oil reserves” in the North Sea he repeated yet again. Pull the other one Salm.

When Bonnie Prince Charlie attempted his power grab in 1745, lieing to the natives helped him gain the numbers which eventually threatened London.

But, when pressed, he was always short on resources and reserves, relying on bluff, bluster and force of personality.

The Scots who joined him were too trusting, too loyal, too blind.

Better trust in the Wee man’s judgement they said, he knows what he’s doing and look at the runaway success so far – we’ll all be rich.

So much for false prophets operating on hot air and promising the world.

Most pesky Scottish natives ignored the Pretender, preferring to look on with mild concern.

Salmond is not a statesman. So why does he talk down to us like one?

Effectively, the Nationalist Executive, supported by the Big Parish Cooncil at Whollyrude, cannot be trusted to do what it’s supposed to do.

The Edinburgh Nationalist elite have done virtually nothing with their devolved powers other than make laws which are repeatedly defeated in standard courts when challenged.

Norway, a smaller country than Scotland in terms of population, is far mroe prosperous than the UK.

So what? They do things differently there because they are different. They’re a different country. Ho hum.

So when Moses Salmond looks across the sea and says we could be like them, it bears further analysis.

And that’s when it comes down to trust.

Do you trust Salmond when he puts a hard figure on the oil reserves left in the North Sea?

The answer to that question will probably determine how you choose to vote.

Just because the Scots don’t trust the Tories doesn’t automatically mean they trust the Nationalists.

In many ways they’re both sides of the same coin – the Tories and the Nationalists – slippery, deceptive and indifferent to the general population at large.

They’re more interested in power and the maintenance of power in order to gain patronage from the various power elites out there. You scratch my back and…

Under the UN Law of the Sea Treaty, 90 per cent of the oil in our waters would legally belong to an independent Scotland.

But this, like so many other issues, would have to be negotiated – relying on the good will of our Southern neighbours to let everything run smoothly.

Like that’s going to happen any time soon. Gideon’s recent foray into Edinburgh is a foretaster of potential negotiations.

Wars are inevitably fought over territory, beliefs and resources.

Attempt to take away a valuable resource from a state used to its benefits for the past thirty years and you’re looking at BIG trouble.

Take a look at the relationship between North and South Sudan post-independence if you want a potential taster.

Oil is a bonus to Scotland and it’s the only tangible asset we have which gives the Nationalists a chance in their naked power grab for the country.

The Nationalists don’t have, and probably never will have, the arguments to carry the majority of the country with them.

Like the Pretender of 1745, they can inspire many with their promise of riches for those willing to follow their vision. Most of the Jacobite rebels thought they were going to get a X-Box, or its 18th century equivalent.

But when the Nationalist vision is closely scrutinised it doesn’t quite look the same in the cold light of day.

Not that the Hanoverian Tories can be trusted either. They’ll probably ‘bayonet’ the wounded after the main battle is fought. Like the Nationalists, they have no concern for the casualties.

Ho hum. The Nationalists brought it on themselves.

It all comes down to which side you trust – Unionist or Nationalist.

Some of us trust neither.

Next!

COMEDY RELIEF

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