Moan McVulpine: Real grievance junkies are in the Scottish parliament

MOAN believes Scotland’s grievance list can grow and become one of the most ingrained chip-on-shooders’ in the world if people get fully behind the Nationalist plan.

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By Moan McVulpineSubsidising her pay cheque like the rest of them

SOMETIMES A picture can tell a story better than words.

Skintland’s Future, a politicised Santa list, is more than 650 pages long,

That’s less than a page for every weary tiresome day of Neverendum campaigning since the Nationalists started their soul destroying, spirit draining, vanity project.

At a glance it tells the story of the SNP’s connection to reality. It’s why it reads like the abridged version of the Lord of the Spins.

We have:

  • 55 per cent of Europe’s assertion, wish lists and fantasy claims
  • 21.6 per cent of all political lies, well above our population share.
  • Alcohol consumption worth 4.3 billion hangovers a year
  • A rural and island economy worth its weight in tattie scones
  • 98.8 per cent of UK oil production, which forms the crux of every single sadsack grievance based argument the Nationalists have to make.

If Skintland was independent it would be the eighth moaniest country in the world among the moaning nations of the Moaning Organisation and Associated Negativity Association, or MOANA.

Skintland’s Future, the 670 paged tax payer paid for Vanity Project, unveiled last week, has a full chapter on what will happen to the Polls, Parkas and anti-Skints – all backed up with solid legal uncorroborated detail.

For every single year since 1980 Skintland paid in jobs, lost industry and despair, thanks to the Nationalists decision to vote for Margaret Thatcher in the No confidence lobbies of dreaded Westminster in 1979.

Yet in those 30 years London politicians and newspapers – aka English basturts – telt us the SNP shouldnae huv voted for her if we didnae want her dose of oil funded Tory ideology.

In the last five years alone, Skintland has had to listen to a litany of Nationalist grievance pish which has been ingrained into at least a quarter of the population.

While gross barefaced grievance per head in Skintland has ramped up under the Nationalists, so far the rump of Skintland seems completely unmoved.

Being called “coward”, “scum”, “cringer”, “Stockholm syndromed”, “traitor”, “Quisling”, “collaborator” and “turncoat”, might have something to do with this resistance to the ‘inclusive’ and ‘progressive’ message of the Nationalists cyber foot soldiers.

Who knows?

But if the history of the 1979 sell oot o’ Skintland by the Nationalists shows us anything, it’s that they have no realistic vision for the future. Not one Scooby!

Anyone with half a brain could see what was coming with Thatcher and her harsh greengrocer balance book rhetoric.

But not the Nationalists.

Their ‘guid conceit’ o’ themselves condemned Skintland and England and Wales and Northern Ireland to Thatcher’s withering political ideology.

That’s why Skintland’s wealth evaporated like sweat off of Salmond’s shiny chins.

That’s why families struggle to heat homes while the Nationalists still bleat that we need the windmill subsidy.

The Skintland’s Future document puts forward carefully crafted bribes, suppositions and whatabouteries that were being rubbished by sniggering journalists within minutes of them getting their hands on it.

The Nationalists believed they would double their seats from 11 to around 20 in 1979. That was the vision – the fantasy. The Skintish electorate wiped them out.

They were reduced to a mere two whimpering wreck MPs without a clue about what had just happened.

That’s the Nationalist way. Promise the earth, deliver next to hee haw.

That’s the choice we face next year with the Nationalists.

We can buy into the bluster, grievance and politics of self-righteous moral superiority.

Or we can suffer the consequences of the forces their Nationalism will unleash throughout the isles.

No one knows for sure what shape these forces will take.

But one thing’s for sure, they won’t be nice and they won’t be pretty.

Whichever way we vote, you can predict one thing – PAIN!

Still, as a list MSP, Moanie should be fairly sure that she’ll still have a £50,000 plus wage with a £20,000 plus expense account to look forward to.

So, at least she’ll be alright Jock.

That’s a Yes vote then?



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