Moan McVulpine tells Duke to keep his fracking hands to himself

MOAN MCVULPINE believes that Buccleuch Estate’s plan to drill for gas in the village of Canonbie has parallels with the decision to allow Donald Trump to destroy an area of Special Scientific Interest in the Menies estate.

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By Moan McVulpinepaying hypocritical lip service to virtue

DICK DOUGLAS Scott, the 10th Duke of Buckie, has a big hoose and an even bigger garden.

He’s a direct descendant of one of Scotland’s most dashing heroes of the Wars of Independence, the Black Douglas.

But that means nothing now. He’s going to use his own land to rake in the cash.

And what’s best, Westminster can be blamed for the situation.

Plus, this time Moanie gets to play the class card and evoke the shibboleth of poor tenants being oppressed by evil lairds. Result!

The concept is tiresomely sound enough.

It’s just that it comes across as a bit hypocritical when directly compared with what happened at the Menies estate up North.

Evoking the concept of “environmental vandalism” on the Buccleuch Estate, McArthyalpine made Moanie near choke on her breakfast coffee.

The existence of a Site of Special Scientific Interest in Menies didn’t protect the area from the “environmental vandalism” wreaked upon it by the Trumpton corporation.

But that was different. Then, the centralising SNP was the driving force behind the bulldozing of local democracy in the face of corporate profit.

That kind of anti-Democratic action is “for the good of the country” and anyone who says different is talking their country down.

Now, the Duke of Buckie has given the go ahead to fracking – a controversial process which could result in cheaper energy prices for normal folks.

The SNP don’t like that. It gets in the way of them forcing Salmond’s subsidised renewables vanity project on the country.

And the option to stop the fracking on the Duke’s estate can’t be stopped by fair means or foul.

Cue Joanie getting her weekly dig in about how subjugated we poor Scots are by Westminster.

If only we had more power to overturn previously agreed planning permissions, we could stop the evil Duke from oppressing his poor powerless serfs.

Compassionless Westminster, the source of all our woes, is only interested in oppressing us aided by heartless turncoat tyrants like the Duke.

Isn’t it about time the Joanie’s of the world washed their infantile hands of this kind of grievance politics?

Moanie thinks so.

COMEDY RELIEF

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