Posted by Och Aye the Noo Scotland on January 27, 2013. More in hope than in credibility.
Welcoming today’s Flannelbase poll for the Funday Times and Unreal Radio Scotland, the Chief Fantasist of Och Aye the Noo Scotland, Tonyblair Jenkins, said: “What this poll shows is that there is a solid and sustained attempt to clutch at any straw which backs up my/our increasingly ludicrous assertions on independence. According to these online paid for figures, a swing of just 70 per cent could lead to the emancipation of the subjugated, colonised and Stockholm Syndromed Scots.”
“At 23%, this is 47 points higher than the recent Anti-Scottish Social Attitude survey which, insignificantly, was conducted before we fully realised that the Tories aren’t very nice to welfare beneficiaries and they’re not very nice about the Big European Quangocracy either.”
He added: “We have also had the Westminster coalition’s admission that the SNP are relying on them to do something really really nasty in the hope they might gain some rebound votes for Indy. In this the SNP are absolutlely correct and we hope and pray that the Tories look like they could get re-elected in 2015. We already have Bullingdon Dave’s raw meat eaters to thank for easing the pressure on our sand shifting EU deceptions.”
“We do not underestimate the credibility gap we have to bridge for us to be taken seriously by Autumn next year. Mission Impossible our opponents are calling it. We have to persuade those who believed Devo-Max was their preferred choice that that was also the Firstminster’s preferred choice an’ aw. That basturt Cameron killed off that failsafe option for Oor Wee Eck. This debate will drone on and on and on and we are confident that we will be the only people left interested or standing by Autumn 2014.”
[AhDinnaeKen would like to apologise for the consistently longer than 25 word sentences. Tonyblair Jenkins is nothing if not a bit of a turgid windbag. Though you probably knew that about ex-BBC Tristrams anyway.]