Cooncillor Matheson apologises for alleged indecency

Big Chief o’ Glesca Cooncil fun’ oot! Confesses to colleagues over adverse publicity fallout.

“There is not enough celebration of companionship. Relationships aren’t just about eroticism and voting intentions.” – Francesca Annis

“There is not enough celebration of companionship. Relationships aren’t just about eroticism and voting intentions.” – Francesca Annis

By Fellae Show

GLASGONE CITY Cooncil leader Hardon Matheson was reported to the procurator fiscal by police over an alleged public indecency recently.

Prosecutors decided to take no further action after concluding that “voting SNP is only a crime against sensibility” and that no one else had been hurt as a consequence of the ill judged action.

Labouring cooncillor Matheson, 64, said he had meant to go ‘cottaging’ instead but sometimes his “wilder side” got the better of him.

He said: “I have been having an affair. I have been falling below my own standards and my loving party deserves better.

Hurt and embarrassment

“I am sorry for the hurt and embarrassment I have caused and I will do all I can to make up for it.”

A spokeswoman for Strathclyde Polis confirmed that the alleged incident had taken place during recent cooncil elections.

She said: “A 64 year old cooncillor was the subject of a report to the procurator fiscal in relation to an alleged indecency in a Cathcart Balling-room voting booth 3rd May 2012.”

The matter was fully considered by independent Crown counsel, who concluded that there was insufficient evidence that voting SNP was any more or less harmful than voting Labourer.

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