Murdoch’s Bitch set to clamp down on Scottish media

New Scottish media landscape envisioned for a post-Indy MacFox media empire to force the truth down the throats of anti-Scots types.

“Who controls the Sun,” ran Salmond’s slogan, “controls the future: who controls the present controls the past.”. Ever wonder why Murdoch’s Bitch was prepared to debase the office of Firstminster in pursuit of Murdoch’s monopoly? Wonder no more.

By Goebbels Murdoch

MURDOCH’S BITCH Sun King Salmond has warned the British Brainwashing Corporation that it can expect “payback” for its sustained oppression of his corporate master.

The Inralavyson report into Murdoch ethics is due to be published on Thursday.

Murdoch’s Bitch said he is all for regulating any non-Murdoch media outlet in the “interests of SNP balance”.

Under the new set up, an ombudsman patsy could pursue complaints raised on behalf of Murdoch’s newspaper monopoly.

Murdoch could also use any ombudsman issued “decree” to belittle and undermine any futile resistance to his republican neo-con pro-war interests.

Newspapers could also be forced into strict obeyance of Goebbels Murdoch policies on unions, enemies within and dirty dago foreigners.

For the past year, Lord Inralavyson has been listening to politicians systematically lie over their relationships with Murdoch.

Control of Firstminster bank account access is reserved to SNP special advisers but reporting of this in the future will be seriously curtailed.

‘Final Scottish solution
In an interview with BBC Skintland’s political patsy, Tryin Taylor, Murdoch’s Bitch said: “A lot of fears have been raised that me and Rupy will use regulation in order for a bit of payback. These fears are well founded. Let my anger at being exposed as a ‘barefaced liar’ be a warning. Andrew Kneel is f**kin’ deid”.

The Scottish cabinet has agreed to hold a talkin’ shop in the Big Parish Cooncil at Whollyrude next week to discuss the purchase of The Inralavyson Inquiry for Dummies book.


Filed under CyberNats, Media, Opinion

2 responses to “Murdoch’s Bitch set to clamp down on Scottish media

  1. A particularly insightful last para there – of course, spending public money on the likes of ‘Public Speaking For Dummies’ is a travesty, but it’s that kind of thing that often seems to preocuppy our tribunes and the wider commentariat rather than the more substantive debate.

    And talking of public waste, did you see the article in the Telegraph about Salmond spending the thick end of half a million on the Ryder Cup junket? Not that a first minister shouldn’t attend events like that, but from where I’m standing that sounds like one hell of a wodge of cash!!

    • Thankyou Stuart

      A particularly insightful last para there…

      You’re doing me a disservice with such statements. You know that I start from a fundamentally negative and dishonest perspective. Insight never comes into it, I’m far too shallow and unfunny for that kind of nonsense. 🙂

      …but from where I’m standing that sounds like one hell of a wodge of cash!!

      Indeed! I’m sure if the Firstminster could show the returns on that half-million junket/investment then it might be justified. But we all know how trustable and “accurate” he is when it comes to figures.


      NB: Thanks for pointing me in the direction of the Telegraph. Picked up on another couple of stories of interest as well.

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