New hard hitting report shows that Trade Unionists may not be so Unionist after all.
By Ghetinty Him
UNION COMRADES huv telt BAITH sides in the Neverendum debate to stop name calling and smash each other in the face insteid.
A hard-hitting report from the STUC blasts “the overall mediocrity of the barefaced language used” and voices “frustration at the lack of full on barefaced knuckle tae the heid contact”.
The report – called Just Punch Their Heid In – says a mare impassioned vision of partisanship and nationalist hatred is needed if the Just Say Yes (please) campaign is to succeed.
But it also warns Tory Labourers “not being the Tory Tories” and negative messages about the Tartan Tories will not be enough to win its comradely support.
Last night STUC General Commissar Greyhame Smythe said: “This report expects many answers, reflecting a general view that Johann Lament and Tricky Dicky Salmond should just lay into each other’s faces wi’ wet cloots.
He also chanted: “We need mare fisticuffs and less sloganeering!
“We need mare fisticuffs and less sloganeering!
“We need mare fisticuffs and less sloganeering!”