SNP to tippex record of past four weeks

Past four weeks to be erased from the political record in preparation for neverendum in 2014.

“And then I said, this lie is as accurate an answer as anyone has ever given to parliament” joked  Tricky Dicky Salmond as he and his front bench shared a laugh at the people of Scotland’s expense.

By Ahkanny Wate

FURIOUS BIG Parish Cooncillors last night demanded Tricky Dicky Salmond stop trying to rewrite history.

Tory Tory Liz Smythington-Smythe clocked out at the Firstminster who has tried to erase the official record of ‘liar incidents’ over the past four weeks.

She accused the ‘barefaced liar’ of trying to lie after his exposure for lying over his “serial lying” in Whollyrude.

It follows recent uncovering of yet more barefaced lies over EU Pantsonfiregate, Education Cannaecountgate and Environmental Windbagjobsgate.

Ms Smythington-Smythe said: “This has to stop. It’s not the first time this month he’s tried to lie about his lies.

“There are so many lies flying around that it’s difficult to tell the pragmatic lies from the wee white lies and the wee white lies from the barefaced lies.

“It’s got so serious I can’t tell the difference between my lies, the Labour party’s lies and the Firstminster’s barefaced lies.”

Labourer’s Master Baker said: “It’s getting so bad he’ll probably apologise for the last four weeks ever having existed and then attempt to tippex out the apology.”

Fibbing lying truth mangling spokesperson for the SNP Wee Naebudy said: “If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything. If you don’t tell the truth you have to erase the record of everything.

“The Firstminster is only doing what any progressive inclusive ‘different’ government would do in what are exceedingly difficult circumstances.”



Filed under CyberNats, Morality, Newspeak

5 responses to “SNP to tippex record of past four weeks

  1. Since some people don’t seem to ‘get’ satire I think I’ll maintain a diplomatic silence on the contents. Heehee.

    But congratulations on the graphic – it must have taken a fair bit of photoshopping work to get them all looking so frivolous and self-indulgent at the same time.

    Useful metaphor for our seat of democracy as well.

  2. Stuart

    I’m glad you think that my deadly serious and hard hitting insightful blog is satire. 🙂

    Amazingly, the picture isn’t photoshopped. It’s a captured frame from FMQ after Ruth Lamont had referred to Mike Russel’s HND education cuts as “snobbery”.

    I always keep an eye out for what could potentially be funny frames.

    Makes the metaphor even more poignant.


  3. Thanks. Thought as much about the graphic – that was my lame attempt sarcasm!!

  4. Doh!

    I’ll apologise in the blog later. The Politically Disenfranchised code says that any hate blinded idiot who does not recognise sarcasm in the comments must apologise to the blog later that day.

    Either that or resign.

    Consider my wrist well and truly slapped.


  5. Heehee – the reason I knew it wasn’t photoshopped was because if it was then Kenny MacAskill and Alex Neil would have been in it as well!

    Great photo though!

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