Radical new agenda will ensure the patriotic purity of oor great wee faitherland
By Termin Nation
SNP MINSTER for Wellbeing, Temperance and Intolerance Alex Kneel has outlined controversial plans to deal with Scotland’s anti-Scots enemy within problem.
Kneel said that advances in political science meant that there was a case for compulsory abortions of expectant mothers who fail a ‘Pregnancy Inquisition’.
Speaking exclusively to Skintland on Doomsday, Kneel categorically stated that the SNP has had enough of anti-Scottish blasphemous sniping at his party from the sidelines.
“There is a definite case to be had for a strategic reduction in anti-Scot numbers throughout the country. Abortion will form part of our flagship plan.” he said.
He would not be drawn on the form of a proposed ‘Pregnancy Inquisition’ but did hint that the father of the unborn child will also be “thoroughly investigated” for impurity of thought.
The newly appointed piggy eyed patsy made his views known after it became clear that the Unionist forces of anti-Scottishness were massing against the Neverendum.
Post-independence, any pregnant mother will undergo rigorous testing based on a series of criteria including wealth, genetics, intelligence and beliefs.
Joan McCarthyalpine is currently in talks with world leading scientists at the forefront of eugenic theory and cloning.
Kneel indicated that he would be relaxed about pregnant women escaping over the border so long as they did not expect to return with their progeny.
“That happened in Nazi Germany where German mothers carrying half-Jewish babies would escape over the border. The faitherland always welcomed their return so long as they returned empty handed.” cooed Kneel.
Previously, Sun King Moses of Salmond has said that he personally is not comfortable with his people unless they ‘think right’.
He signalled to piggy eyed patsy Kneel that he is “pleased” with the proposed appointment of McCarthyalpine as Grand Dame Pregnancy Inquisitor.
He said: “The problem with Scotland is that it is full of anti-Scots. We must anti-breed them out through Aborto Nocta.”