If nobody came at the mutual masturbation Neverendum Rally

Feartie pants keyboard warriors get keyboards in a twist over navel gazing pre-emptive fear of failure and humiliation at tomorrow’s Frrreeeeeddddddooooommmmmm™ Rally for Scotland’s progressive future. Ho ho hum!

By Rev Stu-pid Dumb-Bell

WE’RE SHITING ourselves at the prospect of a one man and his can of Super Lager turnout at the Frrreeeeeddddddooooommmmmm™ Rally in Edinborrow tomorrow.

We’re begging you to go – the weather’s going to be dry and it’s always good to get pished in Edinborrow for any reason.

So go on! Go on! Go on! Go on! Go on! Pleeaassee!

But you know what’s going to happen? Nobody’s going to turn up other than woad painted Braveheart Commandos wrapped in saltires and sporting ginger CU Jimmy wigs.

Y’know – the Scottish cabinet.

As far as we can see, in our trademark disingenuous ego driven fashion of course, the Unionists and the normal ‘idiot’ population are going to pish themselves laughing at us.

Us, the banned detritus and fallout from NewsNet and just about every other blog committing the Onanistic sin of disagreeing with our frothing bigoted diatribe.

Bastards! It’s f**king inevitable.

The people of Catamintia showed what true passion for and belief in independence really means. Quite a wake up call for us 90 minute chipped shooder keyboard patriots.

But hey ho, when you’re armed with a keyboard and an ego the size of the North Britain region, there’s no accounting for our cupboardised delusions.

One to one and a half million Catamintians rallied in Arseyloner in support of independence from Sane – an unobtainable sum close to the 20% who actually support independence in Skintland.

We’d go on, but the rest is just the usual risible Cybernat sophistry dressed up as serious comment while attempting to disguise its openly narcissistic misanthropy rooted in hatred and contempt for Unionists and any other heretics with the temerity to disagree with us. Phew – that was a big breathed self conscious sentence. We obviously didn’t write it. We blame AhDinnaeKunt.

We know tomorrow is going to be an abject embarrassment to the cause of our ballooning ego and extenuating pathology.

Still, it gives us the chance to patronise others and overestimate our importance with phrases like “…popular politics – particularly in Scotland – happens largely online now…”

A bit rich and more than a bit ironic given that we come from Bath. Haw haw as Buckfast Commando would say.

We hope the rally goes well. But unless it’s an unexpectedly huge success, we also hope that nobody realises it will serve the despicable Unionists as the perfect symbol of the Neverendum: too wee, too poor, too stupit.

COMEDY RELIEF

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Filed under Culture, CyberNats, Referendum, Wangs Watch

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