It’s taken for ever. It’s bored everyone but the Uber nerds and Cybernats to tears. It’s taken its toll of the methadone community in record numbers. Finally the sovereign people of Scotland have decided on their single question. Zzzzz!
By Aboot Timeyagits
THE SOVEREIGN people of Scotland urged the politicians last night to switch to a single question referendum.
The people of Scotland are said to be ready to grant whatever powers the Big Scottish Cooncil needs to hold a legally binding vote on the future of North Britain.
They have also insisted that should the outcome of the vote be Yes, that the requisite granted powers be acted upon immediately.
After five minutes in the pub, with a wee fly smoke before coming back in, the sovereign people of Scotland settled on the final question:
“Do you agree that Scotland should be independent of Alex Salmond?”
Speaking after a visit to the lavvy in Scotstoun Pub Stitchthat Yakunt, sovereign Scot Kenneth McAlpine said: “The people of Scotland have had enough of being dictated to by rich ex-banker economists with their noses in the trough of egotism and self aggrandising satisfaction.
“For too long Alex has talked left and acted right – the Scots deserve a better quality of snake oil salesman.”
Spokesperson of non-denominational trans-gender for the SNP, Wee Naebudy, said: “There comes a time when deceit and defiance must be seen for what they are:
“Sun King Alex of Salmond’s vanity project.”