God-Hen Broon warns of dire consequences for Dandy-Max and Beano

Jings crivens help ma’ boab, auld Bufty Broon’s wades in wi’ a prediction o’ doom and gloom for the independence camp. Nae wunner Wee Eck’s got a smile on his face bigger than the banking deficit.

Advice is always the swan song of the passing generation, the quavering high treble of our experiences which we insist upon dedicating to those who come after us. Thanks for nothing God-Hen.

By A’Body’s Wullie

GOD-HEN BROON has launched a scathing attack on the Beano camp, claiming that staying in circulation would lead to higher cover prices and cuts to frontline cartoon characters in the Dandy.

  • God-Hen Broon warns of higher cover prices and deeper numbers of page cuts for DC Thommoson comics
  • Former PM argues that pooling of resources benefits Desperate Danny-Alexander more than Lord Snooty Chancellor
  • Broon also argues that Bash Street Minister Mike Rust-ell will be particularly bad for education and the ‘kids’ in Scotland
  • SNP – “the more Labouring ex-chancellors continue to offer doom and gloom armageddon negativity, the more they will encourage Joan McCarthyalpine to expose the anti-Scots within the nation.”

The former Iraq War Chancellor said the proposals known as Dandy-Max, would “break up the reader union” between the Beano the Dandy the Broons and the rest of the DC Thommoson empire.

It would mean that Wee Eck would be unable to ask Desperate Danny or Lord Snooty for cow pies or catapults leading to the comic being starved of pages, gags and humour.

In his first major intervention for the Yes campaign, the former Labour Bannana Man said there would be a “race to the bottom” of the internet wilderness, with different rates for subscribers and advertisers alike and a higher cover price.

Delivering the annual Donald Dewaraglit lecture at the Edinborrow International Book Festival, Mr Broon warned that the Dandy was in danger of being ‘colonised’ by the Beano and could only expect to suffer decline.

Wee Eck was unavailable for comment as he wis oot ‘playing’ wi’ Soapy Souter and their Wulllie.

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