Scottish cooncil witch hunts: SNP manifesto at-a-glance

The SNP cooncil witch hunt manifesto has pledged to put the party and their cooncillors across Scotland at the forefront of its campaigns.

The party also wants to stuff public disaffection doon the throats of all the other parties while bribing cooncil tax beneficiaries with some financial jiggery pokery

Here is a look at the main policies:

  • Build 5000 reasons to vote for independence.
  • Maintain silence on any projects that look like going belly up.
  • Raid pension pots for headline making vote winning projects.
  • Exploit anything that can be Trumped up as good news.
  • Go to court using taxpayer money to supress any stories potentially embarrassing to SNP.
  • Get help from Goebbels Murdoch at strategically useful times.
  • Design more tartan and shortbread tins to appeal to American billionaires.
  • Bribe cooncil tax beneficiaries in cynical vote winning strategy.
  • Keep shtoom on future corporation tax policy for benefit of tax avoiding sharks.
  • Guarantee positive learning or training statistics for 16 – 19 year olds
  • Keep beating teachers over head with line that “Indoctrination of Pure Excellence” is good for education.
  • Bleed Councils dry of potential funds until after 2014 referendum
  • Introduce highly dubious wage by April 2013
  • Make no mention of Gay marriage in muslim voting areas

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Filed under New Bills, Newspeak

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