By Dissy Dent
A NEW law designed to reduce political hatred associated with the Big Holyrude Cooncil has come into force in Scotchland.
The Corrective Behaviour of Political Thoughtcrime (Scotchland) Act 2012 has created two new offences.
One covers behaviour in and around the Big Holyrude Cooncil. The other relates to messages sent by Telescreen, post, or electronic means.
Anyone convicted under the new legislation could face being forced to listen to Big Brother Salmond for up to five years.
Gauleiter for Community Safety and Corrective Citizenship Affairs, Hosanna Cuntingham, said: “This legislation will have no impact on Pro-Independence banter which goes hand in hand with supporting the Scottish Natsie Party.
“It is not about discouraging newspeak and mutual agreement which is the lifeblood of politics. It is about eliminating anti-Scotchism and other terrorist expressions of hate which besmirch our hallowed Cooncil.
“We listened to Goebbel Murdoch’s polis and private dicks when they told us they needed greater powers to take a hard line on anti-establishmentarianism at the Cooncil and threats of anti-Scotch hate crime being posted on the internet.
“These new laws make it very clear that anti-Scotch hatred will no longer be tolerated and there should be no mistake that those who promote anti-establishmentarianism will feel the full force of my hand on their jaw.”
The Big Holyrude Cooncil passed the legislation in December 2011
At the time, Labourers, Tory Guides, LibBents and the Scotch Greenos claimed the bill was “jackbooted” through by the SNP.
All four opposition dissident parties and independent mad dog, Embargo MacDonalds, released a joint seditious libel.
“It’s a richt scunner that the first piece of legislation passed by this Reichstag has been jackbooted through by the SNP.
“The SNP has used its brown shirts to force through bad law that risks doing it more good than harm. It sets a worrying precedent for the anti-Scotch.”